These words are from my heart, when I embraced my Mermaid Self, and submerged to my depths, exploring an ocean of mystery. My inner most shielded parts that I refused to accept or acknowledge. And as I embraced my deep watery self, of being comfortable swimming in the currents that before were so overwhelming, I learnt to love my inner self. I learnt to accept the parts that had been denied, and bring those parts out of the depths and into the lighter shallow waters dappled in sun.
When we hold onto our pain, our guilt, our shame, we begin to turn away from who we are, thinking we are wrong, unacceptable to the framework of society. We blame ourselves for events out of our control, we take on the pain of others as if it is our own, and we carry the burden, hide it away in the depths until we have the courage to look within.
In a way I would call this hidden self our treasure! That which is locked away in a huge old chest, buried under the sea. When we are brave enough to seek it out and open the lid, what we find is wholeness. A coming together of self, that is far less scary than the fear of the unknown. When we finally take the dive into the shadow self, down through the watery realms of emotion, we find the key to healing, to acceptance, to the wisdom that we have held another's pain. We have inherited their fears, and they have inherited the fears of those gone before.
The loop is revealed, and hence an awakening. What has been hidden is released and bubbles to the surface, no more holding the weight of the emotion. No more holding you by the ankle pulling you under to get your attention. The watery depths begin to give you peaceful moments of reflection, in total stillness. Just gentle movement under the surface. And in that peacefulness, you can begin to trust, to surrender, to let go of the pain and suffering. To forgive your small self that carried the blame for others, to forgive others for doing the same.
The line of ancestry begins to open, and you begin to embrace the lessons of the pain, the essence of the wisdom, you begin to feel grateful for the lessons learnt, and then you can see again the small gift of life. The opening of a flower, the beat of a butterfly's wings, the breeze gently moving the leaves, a friendly smile, a laughing child, the love that permeates the world within the chaos.
